


it's alright to not be fine

by 95leo



Category: AB6IX (Band), MXM (Band)
Genre: Boys In Love, Boys Kissing, Fluff, Hurt/Comfort, Light Angst, Lots of dialogue, M/M, REALLY BADLY, Woojin is mentioned, daehwi and woong have a role, i just miss them, uhm.. idk what more, very light, youngmin is just baby
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-04
Updated: 2020-10-04
Packaged: 2021-03-08 03:07:02
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,722
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26808613
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/95leo/pseuds/95leo
Summary: youngmin is just stressed.
Relationships: Kim Donghyun/Lim Youngmin
Comments: 3
Kudos: 18





	it's alright to not be fine

youngmin sighs as he gets into his (and donghyun) empty apartment. the black haired puts down all his stuffs on the table before plopping right into the sofa at the living room.

this week (and the last few weeks, if he was honest) hasn't been the best for him. he has to get works done here and there. he wakes up very early in the morning almost everyday and comes home very late at night. and that's really eating him up. 

sometimes, donghyun would wait for him until he gets home, and that would be one of the few times he'd get to breathe properly. dramatically so. donghyun would bring him to the dining table, make him a very simple dinner (most of the times they'll just eat cereals together at dinner) and they will talk their days out. it is a frequent occurrence but they haven't done it in a while because these days, things are chaotic even on donghyun. even if the younger didn't say. youngmin would come home to a dark apartment each time, donghyun would already be asleep by the time he was home. 

unconsciously, the memory from earlier plays in his mind. 

youngmin took slow and heavy steps as he and donghyun walk into the bus station while holding hands. donghyun noticed that and tried to stifle a laughter, youngmin being very oblivious about it. 

"hyung! you look like you just lost your firstborn" the brunette finally say with obvious amusement laced to his tone. 

youngmin looked down to their linked hands before sighing loudly. "it does feel like that, if i'm being honest"

donghyun snorted at that, laughing even harder. that eased up something in youngmin as he laughed along with the younger. "it's just for a few days. i'll be back before you know it" donghyun managed to say after. youngmin slumped into his seat at that because a few days without donghyun would feel like years (totally no exaggeration right now)

after few moments, the passagers for donghyun's bus got called and youngmin felt his heart drop as he tighten his hold on the other's hand. donghyun noticed and give him a small smile, "do you want to follow? we have an extra space for you if you want" 

"i can't, donghyunie" he said, sadly while loosening his grip, "my project is due monday.. i really would love to go with you though" 

donghyun noticed the sudden gloom and went to the older, wrapping his arms around him. "it's okay" 

god knows how hard it was for youngmin to hold back his tears when donghyun said that. yes it was nothing, probably out of context but the week was hard for him and when the younger said that, he was so close to breaking down but he didn't want to worry anyone, especially not donghyun when he was about to leave for the weekend. 

youngmin sighs again. he kinda really miss the younger and it hasn't even been a full 24 hours. 

his phone rings, startling him from his thoughts. he takes the call, without even bothering to look at the caller id, knowing it'd be just one of the kids (daehwi, woojin or woong. even better if it's donghyun) because no one else would call him at such hour.

"hey, youngmin hyung!" daehwi greets. 

"yeah, daehwi" 

"what are you doing?" 

"i just got home from work. what's up?"

"the ceiling" the younger laughs. 

youngmin chuckles, "aha very funny, daehwi" 

"anyway! are you free tomorrow?"

"well, i have to go to the office again because i have a meeting with my friends about our project. why?"

"ah, i know donghyun hyung is not in seoul for the weekend so i'm just wondering" daehwi says, "do you think we can meet tomorrow, though? it's okay if you can't. i am just asking" 

youngmin thinks, he has no idea how long he'd at the office but turning daehwi down will make him feel even shittier than he already is. "i think, maybe? i don't know yet but i'll tell you when i'm done" 

"cool! okay, hyung. take care and sleep well. donghyun hyung said you haven't been sleeping well! wait, have you even eaten?" 

"not yet" 

"god, hyung! it's almost midnight! get something to eat!" 

"okay, mom" 

daehwi snorts, "and when i tell this to donghyun hyung!" "please don't! he will never let me live" "promise me you will eat something before going to sleep" 

youngmin nods, before realising daehwi couldn't see him; which made him feel like a complete fool; and mutters an okay. 

they bid goodbyes and youngmin is back to the loneliness. 

he ends up not even getting anything to eat and goes straight to bed. 

youngmin's alarms have been going off since 8 am but that really didn't wake him up until a call comes in. 

he groans before answering, "yeah, hello" he says, groggily. 

"hyung! are you still in bed?! you told me you have a meeting at 10 am!" donghyun scolds, causing youngmin to be fully awake. 

he sneaks a look at the table clock, 9:45 a.m. 

"oh my god, donghyunie! i'm late!" 

"no shit, hyung. go get ready quick! text me when you're done so i know when to stop worrying" 

the day goes by so quickly for youngmin. he ends up actually being late (for just a few minutes really) for the meeting and though his friends said it was okay, he felt like a very heavy burden to them and it hasn't left his mind, not even once. 

after he was done getting ready, he texted donghyun, like the latter asked him to and got a simple okay as a reply with a selfie attached. donghyun was getting ready for his aunt's wedding. youngmin thought he was cute but he didn't reply because he was too busy trying to get to his office fast. 

he also ended up not seeing daehwi, the youngest said it was okay and he didn't mind it they can always meet another time but youngmin felt so bad about it. daehwi tried to assure him again that it's really okay and youngmin just nod but daehwi knew this hyung of his, he will still feel bad about it until he makes up for it. 

and so here youngmin is again, in the empty apartment, alone and insanely stressed out. 

before he has the chance to sigh, his phone rings. it's a facetime call from donghyun. 

"hey hyung!" the younger greets, showing youngmin his biggest smile. youngmin smiles back, "hello, baby" 

"baby?" donghyun hums, "that's unusual" he teases. 

youngmin shrugs, "ok, donghyun-ah" 

donghyun laughs, "i'm just kidding, baby" the older blushes. "anyway, how was today, youngminie, baby?" 

"uhm, just like every other day... i think" 

"ah! did you go see daehwi? he said you guys were supposed to meet up" 

youngmin shakes his head, "i was having my discussion for too long it was already so late by the time i was done. i feel so bad about it though" 

"oh.. well, it's alright. i'm sure daehwi understands" 

"he does, of course. but i still feel bad. and i was late to the discussion too! if it wasn't for you, who knows at what time i'd wake up! i felt so shitty for making them wait that i bought them lunch to make up to it. but it still makes me feel shitty" he unconsciously whines, pouting so much in the process. 

donghyun coos, "my baby" 

"the project is almost done though, that's a relief. i'm so tired with everything, seriously! i think i'm going to lose my mind one of these days" youngmin says again before realising he just made the vibe gloomy so he force out a bitter chuckle, "anyway, how are you? how was the wedding? was it nice?" 

"it was alright, just same old. nothing interesting happened.. would be better if you were with me, though" 

youngmin sighs unknowingly. 

"hey, it's okay! i still had fun, hyung. don't stress it, okay?" donghyun assures him, which he nods. "did you have dinner?" the younger asks, eyeing him. 

youngmin's eyes widen in realisation. "you skipped dinner again?!" "i'm sorry!" "hyung!" "donghyunie" 

"don't donghyunie me! go to the kitchen now, find something to eat. anything" 

youngmin groans, "i'm too lazy" 

"i will get the earliest bus tomorrow and come back to you if you don't eat tonight" 

"will you, really?" youngmin asks, he's somewhat hopeful if he's being honest. 

donghyun softens at that, "i still have a family gathering tomorrow, baby. i'll be back by monday, maybe? the latest would be tuesday" 

"oh. i will not eat then" "stop acting like a baby!" "so what? i'm your baby" 

donghyun blushes at that, slightly taken aback while youngmin smiles smugly. 

after much bickering, youngmin ends up going to the kitchen anyway. "there's nothing in here, donghyunie!" he whines, showing the almost empty fridge to the younger. 

"that's because we haven't done groceries in forever" donghyun says, rolling his eyes. "there's cereal though, i know there's one. and there's milk. you can have that first" 

"i'm so tired of having cereals as dinner. it's only fine if it's with you" 

"acting like i'm dead or something" 

"hey! let me be dramatic, please" 

"okay, okay, do whatever you want, baby" 

youngmin takes the cereal anyway, putting just a little in a bowl and pour the milk, all with donghyun watching, "satisfied?" 

donghyun smiles, "very much so" 

so he eats them, with donghyun watching him. donghyun lets him eat in silence, just carefully watching his baby eat. it makes him kinda sad to know that youngmin skips dinner and he knows it happens often.

"i miss you, donghyunie" youngmin suddenly say. donghyun smiles fondly, "i miss you too, baby" 

"you know! it has been so long since we sat together and had cereals. you were always asleep when i get home" youngmin pouts "we barely even talk anymore, i think. and now you're away for the whole weekend"

donghyun laughs, "oh my god, hyung. you're really a baby" 

"if only i wasn't so busy at work.. we would've seen each other more. should i just quit my job instead?" 

"hyung, what are you saying? we have both been busy with our own things. i've been busy with my uni works too" 

"yeah i know, but i feel like," youngmin sighs, "you know what, never mind. it's fine" he says. 

"are you okay, baby?" donghyun asks, worried by the sudden change of his attitude. "maybe? i don't know" youngmin shrugs. 

and if donghyun sees youngmin's eyes glisten with tears, he didn't question. he can't question it knowing he's not there to hold youngmin when he cries. 

youngmin wakes up by himself today when the sun is barely even up. he gets up and get to the shower, ready to go to work again. 

his workmate texted him right after he was done with his facetime call with donghyun saying they'll need him tomorrow for some final touches and if he's lucky and manage to get it done by today, he can take a day off on monday. just the thought of having a day off sounds so wonderful to him so he agreed. 

he walks to the bus station in a fast pace. the earlier he gets there, the faster he will get the job done, he thinks. 

when he settles in the bus, his phone buzzs. text from donghyun. 

donghyun: good morning, youngminie baby  
how did you sleep? i hope you slept well  
i miss you! have a nice day ahead and don't skip meals 😡 

youngmin chuckles quietly. he ends up calling the younger, "good morning, donghyunie" 

"oh you're up early!" 

"yeah, i have to go to the office again today.. if i get this project done by today i'll have a day off tomorrow" 

"that sounds good. good luck, baby! i'm rooting for you, okay?" donghyun cheers "but don't skip meals though! if you do i'm going to put you in the elderly house the next time i have to leave" 

youngmin laughs, "why is that?" 

"so someone will take care of you when i'm not around" 

"hey! i am fully capable of taking care of myself" 

youngmin can feel donghyun rolling his eyes at that, "yeah, do we believe him? 100% no" 

"that sounds like a you problem to me" 

"whatever, hyung. don't skip meals, i mean it!" donghyun repeats, in a more threatening manner. youngmin scowls but mutter an okay. 

youngmin groans loudly, gaining attention from his friends, "what's wrong?" 

"this laptop just stopped working! i didn't even get to save the last file i was working with!" youngmin lets out, clearly frustrated and annoyed. 

"hey, i'm sure the file is still there. breathe slowly and try restarting the laptop again" 

youngmin does as instructed and like he expected, the whole thing is gone. everything he has been working on since earlier, it's gone just like that. 

"god damn it!" he yells again to no one in particular. he's just upset. 

he gets up from his table, quickly walking out of the office, gaining few stares from his workmates but he really couldn't care less.

he stops under a tree near his office, taking a deep breath while blinking away the tears that's threatening to fall. he's not going to cry now, he swears to himself not to. he just stare into whatever blankly, mind empty. 

after he has calmed down, he walks back to his office with his head hung low. 

"hey, youngmin hyung? are you okay?" woong asks, worry evident in his eyes. 

youngmin nods and smiles. it doesn't reach his eyes, of course. out of everyone, woong knows him best but woong doesn't question that. instead he lightly brush his hands on youngmin's shoulder, "it's alright! the technician came earlier and he looked over your laptop. he said it was just a little problem and he managed to recover almost all of your work. cheer up, hyung!" 

the older nods again, finally looking up to woong, "thank you, woong-ah" 

"don't worry about it. now let's get back to work and get this done, alright?" 

he fails to get the work done. it's already 11 pm, he's alone in the office and he still has alot to work on. if he don't get his ass to the bus station now, he will miss the last bus and that would mean having to walk all the way from here back to his apartment. 

youngmin contemplates just spending the night in the office but he remembers all the scary ghost stories his workmates ever told him and decided againts it. 

he's really not in the right headspace to deal with ghosts at the moment. 

so with a heavy heart and even heavier steps, he walks to the bus station. it's empty, considering the time and he just know the bus will be even emptier. 

moments later, he arrives home. he sighs to himself while opening the locks. he didn't even notice the pair of shoes infront of the door because he's too busy sighing with just the bed in his mind. 

when he walks into a very bright living room, he stops. i had the lights off when i left, right?, he thinks. 

that's when he heard a noise from the kitchen and his first instinct is to hold onto his backpack tighter and slowly walk to the kitchen. 

there's donghyun, with his back on youngmin, cooking something. 

"donghyunie?!" youngmin calls. 

donghyun quickly turn around, "hey! you're back!" abefore donghyun can say anything else, youngmin is already engulfing him in a hug, "oh my god, you're back!" 

the younger laughs, returning his embrace, "yeah, baby. i'm here" 

youngmin don't reply, just snuggle into donghyun even more. taking everything of the younger in with him.

"baby, i need to finish cooking. if you don't mind" donghyun says, trying to get youngmin off him. youngmin is important but he can't risk burning the apartment tonight. 

youngmin pouts and let go of the younger, but still holding onto him while donghyun walks to the stove again, quickly turning it off. "see, it's burned!" the younger whines, pointing at the fried (or burned) egg he was making. 

"it's okay. as long as you're here, it's okay even if i have to eat burnt eggs" 

donghyun shakes his head, "you're unbelievable, hyung" 

youngmin wraps his hand around donghyun waist, putting his chin on donghyun's shoulder and looks at the egg, "oh donghyunie, i am not eating that" 

"hyung!" "i am not trying to get a stomach ache" "hyung, go and clean yourself up while i fry another egg. i brought home some food from the family dinner" 

youngmin shakes his head, "no, i want to stay with you" he says in a pout. 

"hyung! i'm not going anywhere, i'll still be here when you're done. gosh, you're so baby" 

the older pouts again. 

donghyun huffs and turn around to face youngmin, "youngminie baby, i am all yours after you clean up, i promise. i need to get this done and feed you because i know you skipped dinner again, right?" 

youngmin just smile sheepishly. 

donghyun rolls his eyes, "yeah, just what i thought." 

"have you showered, donghyunie?" 

"of course i have, hyung!" 

"do you want to shower again?" 

"oh my god, i swear this hyung" donghyun says, exasperated. 

youngmin giggles and let go of donghyun, taking his backpack with him and actually goes to shower. 

donghyun smiles fondly at the sight. 

moments later, youngmin comes back with a towel drapped around his shoulder to donghyun setting the table. 

there are alot of food, so much that youngmin actually drools. he don't remember when was the last time he had a proper meal like this and he's insanely thankful for donghyun. 

"donghyun! that's alot!" 

"yeah. my mom packed these all specifically for you after she was done making it. she didn't even serve it for the family yet but already packed them all for you" 

youngmin eyes widen at that, "she did?" 

"yeah, when she was packing it up i was like, what's that for? and she said, for youngmin, obviously. and i was like, ohh mom! and she said, what? and i just laughed. i think you're her new favorite son" 

youngmin squeals in excitement, "wah, donghyunie. i think i love your mother" donghyun rolls his eyes. "don't worry, baby. i will always love you more" youngmin continues. 

and so they sit and eat in a comfortable silence. donghyun smiles fondly at the sight of youngmin, heart so full seeing him. 

"how was today, hyung?" donghyun asks, breaking the silence. youngmin stiffens at that and it doesn't go unnoticed by donghyun. 

youngmin hums, "nothing much. same old" 

"did you manage to get your work done?" 

"yeah... not really. hey, can we talk about something else? what about you? why did you suddenly come home early?" 

"wow, you sound like you hate having me here" donghyun teases. this caused youngmin to quickly looks up to him, shaking his head vigorously, "that's not what i mean! i'm more than happy you're here!"

donghyun laughs, "i know you are, baby. i don't know, the dinner ended earlier than i thought and mom was like are you going home today? and i asked can i? and she said why can't you? so i just did" 

youngmin nods, mouth too full to respond. this made donghyun laugh again, "eat slowly hyung! it's all yours, no one is taking it from you" 

youngmin scoffs, chewing on his food, "what are you doing tomorrow?" 

donghyun shrugs, "no idea. i don't have classes until tuesday. why?" 

"just asking" 

the pair continue on their very late dinner and trashed all the dirty plates in the sink, youngmin swearing he will clean it up in the morning. 

when donghyun walks to their shared bedroom, youngmin goes to the living room instead, taking his laptop out. 

it takes donghyun some time to realise that youngmin is not coming so he comes out again, "hyung! are you not going to sleep?" 

"you sleep first, baby. i need to get a few things done first" 

"can't you do it tomorrow?" donghyun pouts. youngmin looks back to the younger, " the faster i get this done, the better, really. i can spend more time with you after that" 

donghyun nods, there is no use in trying to convince youngmin if he's already fixed on something. so the younger goes to bed. 

donghyun wakes up to the sound of someone groaning loudly. he stirs from his sleep, realising the spot next to him is still empty. 

he gets up and walks out of the room, to see youngmin with his head burried in his hand. "god, why do you hate me so much? i just need to get one more thing done, please be nice to me" youngmin's voice faintly fill the room. 

donghyun chuckles quietly at that. he glances at the clock on the wall, 4 am. his eyes widen in realisation, youngmin hasn't slept all night? he thought. 

youngmin groans again, "oh my god why is this thing not working now!" he says, a little too loud before he brings his hand to his mouth, probably thinking he was being too loud he might woke donghyun up. 

the older then brings his knees up to his face, burying it in. the next thing donghyun hears are faint sobs. 

instinctively, donghyun walks over to youngmin. "hyung?" 

youngmin stiffens at the sound of his voice, the atmosphere becomes a little bit way too quiet for donghyun liking. 

"baby? are you okay?" donghyun asks, carefully. he takes a seat next to the older, making sure the older is aware of it.

youngmin still has his face buried in his knees when he hums lowly. donghyun slowly put his hands around youngmin's shoulder, forcing youngmin to face him, "hey, i'm here, you know?" he calls. 

youngmin finally bring his face up, tear streaks evident on his cheeks, "did i wake you up?" he asks, trying his best to hide the cracks in his voice. 

donghyun shakes his head, "no. i woke up to get water" he lies, "is there anything wrong, baby?" he continues. 

"i have no idea, donghyunie. my laptop stopped working! twice now. and i had redone my parts twice too!" he complains. "it happened earlier today too and i lost almost all of my work. luckily woong called the technician and he was able to recover it but still some parts of it were missing so i had to redo. and i was redoing it just now and my laptop froze. so i restarted it and the work was all gone again. but i just redid it and now it froze again! how many times to i have to redo it, god i'm so stressed" 

donghyun glances over to youngmin's laptop, yeah it froze again and the screen just showing youngmin's work. "do you want to use my laptop?" donghyun asks, carefully. 

"i don't really feel like doing it anymore, to be honest. oh my god, donghyun, i think i'm just going to quit" youngmin says, eyes glistening with tears again. 

"hey, hey. it's okay. i can help you" donghyun tries to say but youngmin just sob right there. "hey, baby. it's okay" donghyun says, as he pulls youngmin into his embrace. 

"it's not okay, donghyunie. i'm so tired. i'm really really tired" youngmin sobs into donghyun's chest. 

donghyun lightly brush youngmin's back, "it's alright to feel like that, you know?" 

"i know, but. it just make me feel so shitty because it's what i have to do but i hate it so much. i hate it so bad. i feel so useless whining about this" he cries, "but, donghyun, it's so hard. truthfully, this week, last week too, i've been really exhausted" youngmin says, looking up to donghyun with teary eyes. 

"i just wanted to come back to you and cuddle with you like we used to do all the time but my job was eating me out alive and when i came home you'll already be asleep and it doesn't sit right with me because i want to talk to you but i know you're tired from your uni works too so i can't really say anything" he rambles on. "oh god, i feel so selfish right now but when you told me you were leaving to go back to your hometown, i felt my whole world crumbling and i feel so bad about that! it's not like you were leaving me forever but i just felt so empty. when i came home, i just wanted to curl up and cry but i didn't because you wouldn't like that, right?" 

donghyun just quietly listen to youngmin, offering a subtle rub on his back occasionally. 

"i dont know, donghyunie. i'm just tired, i think. even crying to you like this makes me feel so useless. it felt like i really don't have a solid reason to be doing this.. like i have no reason to be this upset over something like this"

"it's fine, okay? you don't have to keep your feelings bottled up and what you're feeling is competely valid. if you want to cry, you can just cry" donghyun assures him

youngmin sniffs, "and now i woke you up for this. i hate it. i absolutely hate it" 

"baby, you do know that you can come and cry to me anything you want, right? i'll listen to you. i won't get mad at you for that" 

youngmin breaks away from donghyun to look at him, "i know but i hate feeling like a burden to you" he pouts.

"you will never be a burden to me, hyung" donghyun seriously say, looking right to youngmin. 

"now you make me want to cry even more! god, i seriously don't know what i'll do without you" 

donghyun brings youngmin back to his embrace, "i'm not going anywhere, baby. not anytime sooner. you don't have to worry about that" 

youngmin just snuggle into the younger, humming softly. 

"hyung, do you know that you're really a baby?" 

"please shut up, i'm still sensitive" 

donghyun laughs at that. 

the couple ends up redoing youngmin's part of the project again using donghyun's laptop. donghyun just patiently sit next to him, occasionally offered a small help, like making him coffee, or entertaining him so he don't fall asleep. youngmin feels like it's okay again. 

they—youngmin with donghyun already dozing off by his side, got the work done at almost 7 am so youngmin quickly sent it to woong and when he got a green light from it, he let out a satisfied huff unknowingly. he turns to look at the sleepy guy next to him, smiling fondly. as if planned, donghyun opens his eyes right then and meet eyes with the other, sleepily. "are you done, hyung?" 

youngmin nods before closing both laptops and get up, holding his hands out to the younger. "let's go to bed"

when they settle in the bed, donghyun quickly wrap his arms around youngmin to cuddle. youngmin only smiles as he pulls him closer. "hyung" donghyun calls softly. youngmin hums. "i am so proud of you, you know that right?" 

"what is this about?" 

donghyun looks up to meet eyes with youngmin, smiling just as big as him. "nothing. i just wanted to say" and he bring his face up to plant a kiss on youngmin's lip before snuggling into the other's neck again. 

"hey!" youngmin whines, "kiss me properly" 

donghyun purrs on his neck, "tomorrow" he manages to muffle. 

youngmin is not having that though because he pushes donghyun to be on his back and hover over him. donghyun giggles slightly as he looks into youngmin's eyes and youngmin leans in. their lips move together gently, keeping the kiss sweet. 

it could've lasted forever but eventually they pull away when they run out of oxygen and youngmin rests his head on donghyun's shoulder, regaining his breath softly before moving back to his spot. he pulls the younger into his embrace again. "i love you, donghyun" 

"i love you too, baby" donghyun manages to mutter. 

youngmin falls asleep with a big smile on his face, feeling like he can do anything as long as donghyun is by his side.


End file.
